I did cry the week before I was suppose to go back to work, but it wasn't because I was leaving my babies. I love Connor and Chloe, they are amazing and adorable, but staying at home to care for them is hard. It is especially challenging with two, constant juggling and very isolating. I was happy to be back at the office, working on projects, contributing to the team, and interacting within the adult world.
Maria cares for the twins during the day and does so beautifully. When I see her interact with the babies I realize she is a natural, caring for children is what she is meant to do and I'm lucky to have her help with my family.
Maybe I should feel guilty leaving them with someone else all day, but right now I don't. I'm happy with the care they're getting at home and feel like I can be a better mother when I contribute to my career. It's a balance for all things and I'm figuring out what works best for the Swans.
1 comment:
been meaning to read up on your writings from the early days. funny this is the first one i clicked on. i also just went back to work. i had planned on staying home with them the first year, but i quickly realized that staying home was not for me. been feeling a little mommy guilt that maybe i don't miss them as much as i "should." reading this made me not question myself so much! thank ya!
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